每天至少一更

2：现在100块钱真心不算什么了！早上带着红色毛爷爷出门，手机欠费充值，他变绿了；吃了顿饭，他变黄了；买了本杂志，他变蓝了；再买个煎饼果子，他变紫了；坐个地铁然后转公交，他只剩菊花了；最后买了一个棒棒糖，菊花也爆没了。

我是流着感动的泪水强忍心底汹涌的澎湃带着崇拜的心情拜读完整编文章的…之后心情久久不能平静！楼主的文字功底实在深不可测！直到现在，我想我该留下点什么来赞颂一下楼主！但肚里这三滴半墨水又怕脏了楼主的法眼…千言万语，欲说还休啊！就把我对楼主的崇拜浓缩成为一个字吧： 操

楼主和媳妇在家逗四岁的萝莉，楼主问爸爸对你好不好，小萝莉回答不好，爸爸在公园抱阿姨不抱我，媳妇大怒，小萝莉继续说还是妈妈好，爸爸每次出差，妈妈担心我晚上害怕找个叔叔一起睡。

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昨天跟朋友吃夜宵，酒足饭饱之后准备买单，于是叫老板过来。老板说；一起261块给260算了！我问老板要是264块那算多少？老板说也算260，我于是叫到服务员再来一瓶可乐！

。。。。。

甲：今天我运气太好。乙：怎么了？甲：我早上拿验孕棒给老婆测孕，但是我不会看，就拿去向局长请教，局长说他研究下，乙：然后呢？ 甲：然后下午我就莫名晋升为科长了。

一男子苦于找不到对象，同事便帮其介绍了一个女友！于是两人约了周末出去吃饭，结账时，花费了135元。男子要买单，但是女孩子表示自己也要出一部分（就是那35元）。女孩子解释道：“现在流行AA制，咱们这样叫AB制，呵呵。”男子看女孩这么善解人意，激动地说：“那你的B也太小了

今天去营业厅充话费， 跟妹子说：“充50！” 妹子抬起头问了句：“How much？” 默默愣了，心想，这英语什么时候普及到这程度了！ 默默用不怎么标准的英文回了句：“fifty！” 妹子调高了音量：“号码是？” 一瞬间，天雷滚滚！！！50！” 妹子抬起头问了句：“How much？” 默默愣了，心想，这英语什么时候普及到这程度了！ 默默用不怎么标准的英文回了句：“fifty！” 妹子调高了音量：“号码是？” 一瞬间，天雷滚滚！！！